It’s been a long time since I’ve written. Not because I haven’t had anything to say, but because I’ve had too much to say. What I’ve learned – abet the hard way is, it’s better to say nothing.
Recently however I had an experience (and it’s not the first time) that left me wondering if people were ever taught manners. This was ‘confirmed’ to me by a conversation that I had this past weekend.
I was sitting at a hotel bar after enjoying the very first decent, non-rainy Sunday in Boston. Of course this was no ordinary hotel; it was one of the most posh in Boston…’Taj’. It sort of reminds me of the Plaza or the Ritz Carlton in NY – old world charm. So why was I there…I stumbled by it while walking through the Beacon Hill neighborhood. I decided to have a glass of wine (way over priced!!!), and work on the novel I’ve been writing (remember that’s why I started this blog to begin with…to focus on writing this “book” – which is going well thank you for asking). It also allows me to listen to and observe people.
No I don’t claim to understand people, I’m no expert but there is something that is clear. People LACK common courtesy.
Thank You, Excuse me, Please…did I say THANK YOU seems to be a dying words in the English language. It makes me wonder if people just ‘expect’ that you will do something – that it’s ‘what you do’. That they are so self-absorbed in their own being that they don’t think it’s necessary that they say something. I wonder if people forget that when you send a card remembering their birthday, or you make an effort to do something that you think will bring a smile, that “Thank You” is the very least you deserve in return. I’ve seen it time and time again. It absolutely boggles my mind that some people just don’t get it. Maybe they were never taught, or maybe they are just so self absorbed that it doesn’t occur to them. Maybe they were never taught (carefully taught…”)
I know my parents made sure that my brother and I said thank you to people (and each other) for any kindness, no matter how small. Their logic was that 'XYZ didn’t HAVE TO DO THIS, so you should be grateful'. What did that mean? You said thank you immediately and if it was something that was sent to you, you then sent a note card; at the very least picked up the phone and acknowledged the other person and their thoughtfulness.
That doesn’t happen anymore. How sad that this, along with the economy has tanked big time.
So I was sitting at the bar watching (not happily, but this is what you do in Boston) the Red Sox, writing and I listened to a mom with her son. They seemed to be having a nice dinner and they obviously had money to spare. It was a cute conversation they were having about their day and things they did. About 10 min after I noticed their nanny arrived with I guess a toy that the child obviously wanted. His eyes lit up, he reached for the stuffed animal. As the nanny turned to walk away, I heard his little voice say “Thank you for finding my bear for me.” She smiled and said “You’re welcome Jonathan.”
I was shocked to say the least, so I said something to her. I asked her how she did that; get a child to understand that those two words are important. She said that she had seen too many children and adults take things for granted...take people for granted. She was determined that her son blessed to have a lot more than other children, not take it for granted. If she could instill manners in him, she would consider herself a good mom. She said “it doesn’t cost anything to say Thank you, so you should show your appreciation.” She said that she wasn’t born into this lifestyle (as she waved around the very opulent surroundings), and was taught to say thank you. Wow, she had parents like mine and is teaching it to her child.
She is right people take things for granted. So, Thank you for reading this my 55th Blog. THANK YOU to those of you who I know (Mom and Dad, Barry, Lanie, Judith and iBert) who religiously read this, as well as those of you pop in from time to time. Thank you to those of you who send me comments directly, for supporting me, and for loving me no matter what. Thank you to all those who have died, are here now, and soon to be born for helping me grow. Hey, since I’m feeling so good, Thank you to those of you who don’t believe in me, wish me failure, and laugh at me moments of weakness…you strengthen me :-)
As I say, my Mom raised me right. Some days I have a slip-up, but it’s not done in malice. The one thing I can say, that I do without fail is say, ‘Thank you’ to those who show me a kindness (and sometimes even to those who don’t). When was the last time YOU said Thank You to someone?
There is electricity in the air, and the change of seasons has nothing to do with it. This country is on eggshells knowing that in about 16 days, we will decide who is leading this country for the next four years. It will be, one of two men who has over the last year, promised to do everything short of walking on water to get your vote. That person will be the next President of the United States of America. What we, rather what I want to know is not what have you done in the past, I want to know what can you realistically do in your first 100 days in office? The key word is ‘realistically.’ No more promises because let's face, politicians don't have a strong record for keeping them. What can you do to help restore this country to one that is not only admired, but also respected by others worldwide?
