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A day to morn, a day to rejoice - Sept 11

Ah....I remember where I was Sept, 11 2001. I arrived early was sitting at my desk at Universal music. My BFF and i had a running joke that she could see me from her penthouse apt (which was just across the plaza from my office) so I was looking up to her window and waving good morning. I didn't really think she could see me, but it was something I did often.

About 8:55 my phone rang, it was my mom to say "hey, a plane crashed into the World Trade Center." I looked out my window and sure enough there was smoke coming from one of the towers. By this time my boss had arrived at work and we were looking at it together as he turned on the TV. Being in music industry there were things we were never without...stereo equipment, speakers (loudly) and TV - usually to MTV, but today we watched CNN.

Just as I settled into his chair to watch coverage, we heard the reporter say "there's another plane and it's turning into the tower". I'll never forget this...As I stood up and looked out the window, I could see the plane just at it struck. Holy Sh*t was the first time I'd ever heard my boss swear. Panic ensued. I tried to call my mom - line busy; I tried to call my BFF as her job was on the other side of Manhattan to see if she knew - line busy. People were now arriving at the office and no one knew what to do, say or what was happening.

I have memories of getting on the elevator, running across the courtyard to my BFF's house - the doorman knew me and was asking me what happened. I told him what little I knew, and then called up to her apt. Her boyfriend said that he had just spoken with her and she was on her way back to the apt. Relieved that she would be on her way I raced back to the office, and discussed the plan of getting everyone in our dept out and home. Of course for the people that lived in NJ there was no transportation in - or - out. NYC was in lock-down.

Once we made arrangements for hotels etc, I went back to my BFF's house and the doorman said "you're family is upstairs waiting for you". I knew what he meant and I think it was at that point she and her now husband did become my family. We cleaned out the fridge of food, and then went to the supermarket to buy more. Friends came over and we all were glued to the TV, just watching the horror over and over and over again. I stayed with them in their apt I think for 2 nights because I was just so scared to take the train home. None of us understood, or knew what was happening yet.

As I sat with BFF we had a telescope and let me just say some of the things I saw falling weren't scraps of paper. We watched, ate, drank copious amounts of ..., well everything and when the first tower fell...I watched stunned. When the second tower fell...I just cried.

Days later the NYTimes posted pictures of those "lost". Day after day I found pictures of friends, former boyfriends, a sales person at the shoe shop I knew.

Day after day the city remained quiet except for the firetrucks and police down at "ground zero". I did manage to grab my press pass and go down there to take pictures. What I remember most, the smell and the dust.

Fast forward, today still leaves me with mixed feelings. You can't change the fact that there no longer is Twin-Towers. If the bureaucrats would get off their butts and play nice, we could have rebuilt something already!! The lives of those killed and their family/friends will never be the same. Even if time heals, this is a day when the nation will constantly remind you. You never forget.

I know that a dear friend whose twin brother was a fireman has still to recover from losing his twin, and has since left his post as a fireman. He just couldn't take the constant reminder.

So what to do...morn and then live. Rejoice in their life. Remember the good times. Live the life they would have wanted for you to live. Pray for our solders who are fighting ... still.

Pray that it never happens again.

Money makes the world go round…

I met a rabbi one day (no this is not a joke); I told him that I wished that I had more money than I had. I told him that I was tired of being ‘poor’ (I know cry me a middle-class river), and wanted to be able to fly off to places whenever I wanted; I wanted a big house, I wanted to be surrounded by at least 2 children, family friends and a man who loved me. I asked him was it bad to be envious of people who ‘seemingly’ had it all? He said to me, there is nothing wrong with wish for, or wanting something that someone else has. The thing is, if you wish for the good, you have to take the un-seen bad that may come along with it. Talk about an ah-ha moment.

The moral to my story – I still wish I had the big house on the sprawling estate and the private jet, but I really don’t want the tax problems that come along with it because of the economy. The reality is – someday in the not to distant future, it will happen.

The rich…I’m not talking a few million, I mean the REALLY, really rich never seem to have any worries. They jet to exotic locations; they have the finest clothes, food and drink. The see something and they buy it. Then there are the rich that are just rich for no real good reason other than they can bounce/throw/hit a ball, or twist the financial industry around their fingers or they are trust-fund babies.

I’m not bashing people who have money and do good, they help their fellow man, spread the wealth, act…well, like normal people and not obnoxious snobs. I’m talking about the people who think that $90million for 3 years is a justifiable amount of money to throw a ball. I mean those that think swindling people (including their own family – glad we’re not related!!) out of their hard earned money/life savings. I mean those that get paid thousands for 15 min to show up at a party, and are famous for nothing at all.

People like the Kennedy’s (yea they have their own ‘stuff’, but in general they believe in service to all people – gotta give them credit for that), Steve Jobs or Bill Gates, these people have money, but they also believe in philanthropy, and the future generation. They are not ones to wear their bling on their sleeve, or flaunt their big homes, private jets, or fancy clothes – but you know they have it.

What does it mean to be wealthy? Is it only monetary? Can we stretch and say it includes family, friends, and if we have a few nickels to rub together (or some good food, wine, music and lots of laughter) that is the whole package? If you have the great family but live in a hut or have a so-so- family but live in Bel-Aire whom would you think the ‘richer person’? Guess it depends on what you need.

I’m lucky – I have a great family and an interesting group of friends. It’s a mix of nationalities, experiences and circumstances. They run the range of friends from grammar school to graduate school. They are black, white, Asian, Hispanic and Indian. They are crazy wealthy, and not so much. There is even European Royalty in there that is a complete nut job, but I love her anyway. If you are looking for someone who is rich, look at the people they keep close to him or her. They are the people you know you can count on and not just because you can get them tickets to a concert, or the latest designer bag free.

Am I wealthy? You bet I am. Maybe not celebrity wealthy, but I am where it counts.