Excuse Me, Please and Thank You...such lonely words!

Ahh, New York in the spring. Nothing like a bit 'o sun to have folks out and about. Sadly, with a rise in temperature...there is an almost equal rise in the lack of courtesy. I don’t mean over the top, I mean just some common “your-momma-taught-you-manners” courtesy. I really can't explain it, yet I am constantly disappointed and often embarrassed by the lack of it.

Webster defines Courtesy as:
1 a: courteous behavior b: a courteous act or politeness that shows consideration for other people or good manners. 2 something done out of politeness or consideration for another person.

I'm not sure when it became gauche to say, “please, excuse me, and thank you”. I don’t remember getting the fax that read “common courtesy is no longer required, nor expected in your daily dealings with people”. I must have missed the email that read “to show how important you are, make everyone you come in contact with feel like a worthless piece of gum. (You know what I really want to say here, but I am too polite to). I never knew when getting on or off the bus or train, became a full-on contact sport.

To say that I’ve had a few ‘interesting’ opportunities to deal with the public is an understatement. I have had more than one opportunity where I’ve asked (in my outside voice) if the offending person was raised by animals? My deepest apologies to animals, even they know better.

What ever happened to the teachings of Emily Post? Look, I’m not saying men should tip their hat, however some of the younger generation should start with pulling up their pants (again, that outside voice of mine). Gentlemen, if you are on the bus and you see a woman who is 24months pregnant, don’t hide behind the newspaper. Give her your seat for the love of god!! Likewise, ladies if you are standing in the way as the train doors open, step to the side or at least move your two-ton purse. Besides the extra weight being bad for your back, you don’t have that much make-up to bring with you unless your name is Tammy Faye Baker.

I feel as if I’m on a tirade the last few weeks, but like the ‘race issue’ that has become part of this years political debate, shouldn’t we debate being kinder, civil…just at the very least acknowledge each other? Maybe it’s all the advancements in technology that cause this lack of personal acknowledgment, responsibility and interplay. Maybe it’s email, text-ing (curse you blackberry!!), and forgetting that we are human, with feelings and emotions. Is it possible that in the country that professes to be ‘advanced’, we are actually no longer civilized? I hope that’s not the case. It may be possible, dare I say probable if we “R-E-S-P-E-C-T” each other a bit more; said “Thank-you, Please and … I’m Sorry” the world would be a better place. Treat others like we want to be treated. Wow…what an idea!!

Thank you for taking the time to read this blog!

Note To Tourists: Just Ask For Directions Already!

Just this past week, I was walking down Park Avenue and a mother/daughter were near the corner. They had the very standard and sadly typical "I'm-a-tourist-and-I'm-totally-lost-but-don't-think-anyone-will-be-
nice-enough-to-give-me-directions” look. This is the one thing I hate, so from one New Yorker, a native born/breed New Yorker to anyone who ever visits 'my city'...ASK SOMEONE PLEASE, for the love of god!! You waste more trying to figure out the city map, than enjoying what the city has to offer. (Just as an aside, the subway may be faster, but you'll get more bang for your dollar/euro/pound etc., if you take the bus. Trust me, a much better view!!)

So back to this mother/daughter duo.

Yes I was in a rush, running late to a meeting, but I know what it's like to be lost. I asked them if they needed help. With a look of hesitance, the mom said, "Do you know where Bloomingdales is?" She had a well-worn map in her hand and a look of fear in her eyes. I replied "Sure it's just 2 blocks away." I dug into my bag for a pen, and marked where we were standing and where Bloomingdales was. She then said "I hate to ask another question, but where is St. Patrick's Cathedral?" So I pointed out this location as well. She was so grateful; she went into her purse and pulled out some money as a 'thank you'. I told her that I couldn't take it, and that my parents raised me to help. Besides I have visited other countries and if I was lost, would hope that someone would help me. In the end I asked her to say a prayer at St. Pat's and put the money in the box for the poor. It took a total of 5 min out of my time, but these two will go back to their home and say that someone in NY took time out to help them.

It made me wonder what this world be like if more people took the time out, and put themselves in the place of their fellow human being? How different would we all be if we took the time out to help, without asking for something in return? In the end, helping these two ladies only took 5 min out of my day and I went off to my meeting. The really good feeling of doing a good deed lasted all day long.

HAPPY EASTER, HAPPY BUNNY DAY

After so much craziness in the world, I found myself this weekend very reflective. I wanted to be in a place of peace and happiness as the majority of the world is in celebration of Christ and the amazing gift he gave to each and everyone that wants to believe in him. What I really find troubling are people who think that their way of prayer, their religion, their method is the only way…the right way. God, Christ, Buddha, Allah, Universe – all equal love right??

Maybe it’s all those years of religious education that makes me especially somber this time of year. Maybe it was the people in the neighborhood walking the Stations of the Cross down my very busy street. Perhaps it’s knowing that my parents are spending this most sacred holiday in Ireland experiencing a different kind of Easter. Possibly its my own search and desire to define what it is I believe.


I found myself watching (as I do every year) The 10 Commandments. It’s the only movie that takes like 6 hrs to watch, where I know it almost word for word, know how it’s going to end, and yet…still get chills every time. This year I also saw “Godspell” the original 1970’s version – which is beautiful, the songs strong poetic, and haunting. This weekend I also saw Rent and found these lyrics equally hauntingly beautiful, and they touched my view of life and love.

From the Broadway play Rent “No Day But Today ”

525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes - how do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee.
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.
In 525,600 minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?
How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love.
Seasons of love.


Today, on this beautiful clear Sunny New York Easter, I went to St. Patrick’s Cathedral. Then I did something that really made me smile…I did the traditional EASTER PARADE walk down 5th Avenue. No I didn’t have a Easter Hat, even though I did get a bright floppy yellow one for my birthday that would have fit perfectly… Even the most jaded person could find joy today. The smiles of everyone either in their Easter Best, or the throngs just watching, taking photo’s, or marveling…it was an amazing day. So I hope on this holy-day, where ever you are, you felt joy. I hope that your view is one of filled with the love of friends and family, one of promise for a better tomorrow.

Ask Me No Questions...I'll Tell You No Lies

This past 10 days NYC has been all consumed with scandal. First there was Elliot Spitzer and not only his challenges as Governor, but also a husband. I am the last person to cast stones on anyone’s relationship – but I think that when you are a ‘public person’ there is a fine line that you walk. Maybe understanding what the words “Public Person/Public Figure” really means. There is a certain level of trust we invest in our governmental representatives, and a certain amount of your private life you give up, just by nature of the term. Personally, I don’t care who they do don’t sleep with. I don’t care if they are gay or straight…I do draw the line when they choose to engage in any relationship and use my tax dollars to pay for it.

If you really pay attention to all the news that has been shared, Mr. Spitzer was tough on crime, and always chose to play hardball (no pun intended). As New York's attorney general, he broke up prostitution rings and on Wall Street, he prosecuted immorality as much as illegality. He was disgraced after it came to light that he allegedly spent over $4,300 for a few hours with Ms. Dupre in the Mayflower Hotel in Washington. What makes this case different than Gary Hart, Bill Clinton, Jim McGreevy, Spitzer's case involves criminality. Prostitution is illegal and Spitzer allegedly paid a Ms. Dupre to take a train from New York to Washington, which also violates federal law. Some of Spitzer's financial transactions also raise legal issues. But Spitzer's hypocrisy drove the media frenzy.

Now we have David Patterson, New York States first African-American Governor. Mr. Patterson is indeed eloquent, a breath of fresh air, charming and very capable, not withstanding his near sightlessness. However, a question startled the packed Albany news conference: Had New York's governor-designee, Lt. Gov. David Paterson, ever hired a prostitute? Paterson touched his chin and leaned into the microphone, and replied, "Only the lobbyists."

Some thought given recent events, the question was in bad taste. In hindsight, maybe that reporter knew something that the rest of us didn’t yet know.

Hours after he was sworn into office, the new First Couple agreed to speak publicly about the difficulties in their marriage in response to a variety of rumors about Paterson's personal life that have been circulating in Albany and among the press corps in recent days. Yes, he too – rather they both had extramarital affairs.

Again, I am NOT judging. I will say that if you ask the question, you have to be ready for the answer. It reminds me of a friends story. Her boyfriend disappeared for several days after taking the state Bar exam. He resurfaced 8 days later, no explanation, but very tan and said that he was in the Bahamas. When asked directly if he went away with a woman she suspected he still had a close relationship with, he replied “No, she met me there.” This is when she learned you MUST ask the right question, and in Gov. Patterson’s instance, the reporter should have asked if he ever had an affair – PERIOD.

I started this by saying, I don’t care who you sleep with, as long as it’s with consenting adult and you are safe. What Gov. David Patterson did before he said that he would “uphold the laws, rules and regulations of the State of New York” is between him and his wife. I definitely applaud him for being open to marital counseling, and taking responsibility for his part in the cracks in their marriage. I wish them both well. What I do care about is the balanced State economy, and what he will do to bring this state back to the glory it once was.

A Delta Love Fest at 360-Sky degrees

Ok, so I know that I gave props to Delta Airlines for being kind on my Birthday, but let me tell you about my experience with them yesterday at the Delta Sky 360 lounge on a rainy Saturday in NYC. The Lovely Ladies of Delta were AMAZING!!!

What's the Delta 360 Lounge??

The Sky 360° lounge, is over 3,500 square foot space on West 57th Street in Manhattan, and obviously...it's all about Delta Airlines. So what's the point...it's to highlight their robust array of in-flight offerings and provides a platform for visitors to try out our state-of-the-art amenities. I say, they did a great job of it. Angela was telling me about their new line of in flight meals, designed by Chef Todd English, and gives the "braised short ribs" meal a big thumbs.

Nicole, Raquel, J.S. and Angela were so nice. They are members of Delta's 360 Staff that include Flight Attendants, those that work in the Crown Room/Business Elite, Ticket Agents and other departments. I actually wish I took a group shot (I'll try to get one before you all leave.) They are all very excited about the new travel routes that Delta will have this year. They will be including some of my favorite places direct from NY to:

Heathrow - YEA!!!!; Edinburgh, Scotland; Dakar, Senegal; Nairobi, Kenya; Capetown, South Africa; Cairo, Egypt; Panama City, Panama; Guatemala City, Guatemala; Port of Spain, Trinidad & Tobago (if you've never been...GO!!); Tel Aviv, Isreal; Malaga, Spain (AMAZING WINE HERE!!!); Amman, Jordan; Lagos, Nigeria; Paris - Orly, and Lyon, France.

So what makes this space so cool, it's beautiful, lots of light, clean lines, and there are wonderful pictures of clouds everywhere...you look up, and see the sky and clouds, even on a rainy day. You know I'm always looking for different views, and this view, was so real you could almost touch it. They had actual new 'improved' seating available for you to try out, and I heard at one point, they even had the new sleeper seat that they have in 1st and B-Class. That would have been nice to try out, since I'm not often able to fly that way myself.

They also had the ability to help you with flight information, give you ideas for future flights, available Wi Fi, and several computer terminals that you could use. The best thing, for at least these moment, we were ALL first class.

They had a wonderful area where you could get complimentary snacks - just like a real flight. Well, not really...at Delta 360 you could actually have the FULL CAN of soda. Anyway...coffee, soda's, juices, crackers and their famous Biscoff cookies were available. I was asking the ladies what has happened during their time on 57th street. Well, there were guest stars, mini Broadway show performances, food tasting, raffles and more. I'm really sorry that I didn't visit more often. Given that they were only open Thurs-Sat, it made it hard to get there from work, and on the weekend I just forgot. Of course, I'm really glad that I made it today. The sad thing, I thought that it would be here always, only to find out that they will be closing for good next week. T hey will be open next Wed Mar 12, and Fri Mar 14 only, so if you're in NY, and on 57th and 6th, stop by.

If some big-wig from Delta should happen to read this, I think that the lounge was a great idea, and you should bring it back.

Reflections...

Imperfect Beauty

The rift in the chest of a mountain,
The twist in the trunk of a tree,
The water-cut cave in the hollow,
The rough, rocky rim of the sea -

Each one has a scar of distortion,
Yet each has this sermon to sing,
"The presence of what would deface me,
Has made me a beautiful thing."
~ Frank H. Keith

I found this poem and thought it was beautiful. In so many ways it gives me the hope that there is beauty in our imperfections...no matter what they are.